Gareth’s story
I've always had a rocky relationship with my mental health since I was a teenager, with regular and protracted bouts of depression and near constant anxiety. One of the most troubling aspects of this has been feeling like I lack control over my mental wellbeing.
I found out about AAL through the Community Links worker at my GP's surgery. Initially I was sceptical, having engaged with other help/resources in the past but also due to this ingrained view I had of myself as being somehow uniquely incapable of actually changing, despite how much I might want to. That being said, I was optimistic and keen to engage in the process.
My experience was positive from the get go. I was paired with Linn and before the end of our first meeting, I felt very at ease with her, comfortable to talk openly and be myself.
The programme has helped me greatly in several ways. It has helped enable me to plan and carry out activities, to reflect positively on what I have done, whether I have achieved the goals set or not and helped me to be less rigid in my thinking, getting away from this debilitating "success or failure" mindset. It has also helped in managing extreme and unhelpful thoughts, as well as managing anxiety out in the world. I am more confident now than I can ever remember feeling before.
My mental health has definitely improved markedly and I am much more active on a regular basis, even on a small scale such as combining a trip out for groceries with a nice walk, rather than just going to the local shops and straight back. The reality is that my mental health issues haven't vanished, of course, I still struggle from time to time, however now I am much better equipped to manage and I am generally trending upwards overall.
I think the thing that surprised me most was that I actually came away feeling that I am in fact capable of change, that I'm not beholden to my mental health issues and the tools that the programme provided do actually work for me.
Probably the main goal I focussed on from the start of the programme was to address my physical health and fitness. Toward that end, I started planning visits to the gym with the idea being to work to create a positive and achievable routine, while remaining flexible in my planning and learning to be kind to myself if and when plans didn't go as expected, or goals weren't achieved.
Three months on from completing the programme, I'm going to the gym more often and extending my workouts, and I'm looking to join a judo class. Furthermore, I'm re-engaging with social groups I had fallen away from prior to starting the programme and I am planning on starting an Open Uni course next year.